The Playbook for a Layoff: From Shock to Strategy

Hey Solo Dad,

We talk a lot about the daily chaos of solo fatherhood, but sometimes, the real chaos comes from a single email, and it hits you like a shockwave.

I’ll never forget the calendar invite. It was from my manager, and when I saw the attendee list, I noticed a name I didn't recognize—someone from HR. I figured it out right then, but I called into the meeting anyway. My manager gave a forced, pleasant greeting and immediately said, “And Susan is joining us today.” My manager began reading the scripted communication—words like “restructuring,” and “impacted role.”

It wasn't panic that hit me; it was an out-of-body feeling. I was physically present, listening to the words coming from my manager and the HR person, but my mind was operating on a completely separate track. I was running scenarios: Child support is due on the first. The mortgage payment is next week. How fast can I pivot health insurance? The external script was about my job; my internal script was about the security of my family.

But once the initial shock wore off, a forced, uncomfortable clarity took over. I had to face the truth: I got too comfortable. That tech role was steady, but I was just showing up. I wasn't growing, I wasn't excited, and it wasn't filling my bucket. The moment you let complacency set in, you stop challenging yourself and you make yourself expendable.

This layoff, as terrifying as it was, was the universe giving me a painful shove toward forced reflection—a non-negotiable pause to figure out what I truly wanted next. It taught me the ultimate career lesson: you must always be nurturing your professional network. These contacts are more than likely how you will find your next, better role.

𝟭 𝗔𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲 𝗦𝘁𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗴𝘆: 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝘀𝗶𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝗡𝗲𝘁𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸 𝗠𝗮𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗻𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲 (𝗖𝗡𝗠)

When a layoff hits, you can't afford to frantically send generic "I need a job" messages. That's desperate, and it burns bridges. Your next job will almost certainly come from a person, not a job board, so you need a system for consistent outreach.

The Fix: The Consistent Network Maintenance (CNM).

• The Goal: Show up consistently and provide value, even when you don't need anything.

• The 3-Person/1-Hour Rule: Dedicate one focused hour, two to three times a week, to reach out to three high-quality contacts.

• The Outreach Script: Do not ask for a job in the first contact. Instead, ask for advice, or offer genuine help. Focus on connection. Examples:

  • “Hey [Name], I saw your post on [Topic]. Great insight. I’m thinking through [Brief, specific industry question] and would love your take when you have a free 15 minutes.”

  • “I’m doing some career mapping, and you’re one of the smartest people I know. Do you have 15 minutes to give me feedback on the kind of role I should be targeting?”

Nurture your team now so they can support you later.

𝟭 𝗠𝗶𝗻𝗱𝘀𝗲𝘁 𝗦𝗵𝗶𝗳𝘁: 𝗙𝗿𝗼𝗺 '𝗖𝗼𝗺𝗽𝗹𝗮𝗰𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝗘𝗺𝗽𝗹𝗼𝘆𝗲𝗲' 𝘁𝗼 '𝗜𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝗔𝗿𝗰𝗵𝗶𝘁𝗲𝗰𝘁'

The layoff felt like an execution, but the truth is, it was an expulsion from a place that let you stop growing. This is your chance to seize control.

The Shift: You are not just looking for a job; you are designing the right job.

• Define Your Bucket: Before you apply for a single role, write down three non-negotiable things that must be true about your next job to fill your bucket. Is it a specific type of challenge? Is it a work-life balance that supports your kids' needs? Is it a mission you believe in?

• Screen the Opportunity: Use your list as a rigorous screening filter. Your goal is to get a job you can’t get comfortable in, because it keeps you engaged and growing. Use this forced pause to gain the clarity you never had time for before.

𝟭 𝗥𝗲𝘀𝗼𝘂𝗿𝗰𝗲: 𝗔𝘁𝗼𝗺𝗶𝗰 𝗛𝗮𝗯𝗶𝘁𝘀 𝗯𝘆 𝗝𝗮𝗺𝗲𝘀 𝗖𝗹𝗲𝗮𝗿

When your career has been destabilized, it’s hard to imagine the next big win. This book is the perfect resource for building consistency when your foundation feels shaky. It doesn’t ask for massive effort; it teaches you how to build tiny, 1% improvements into your daily routine—including your networking and job search. Small, consistent wins are the foundation you build on when you need to climb out of a hole.

You just took a major hit,but you’ve navigated co-parenting battles, you’ve managed the complex demands of fatherhood and career, and you’ve always kept moving forward. Use this time. Be disciplined. Be clear on what you want. And lean on your network.

You've got this.

Cheers to the journey,

Todd